Why I’m secretly happy I didn’t run the London Marathon

Why I’m secretly happy I didn’t run the London Marathon

We’ve all been there (and if you haven’t I strongly recommend it!) on the sideline cheering the incredible London marathoners along their epic 26.2 mile running journey. When the marathon comes to town London is electric with energy. A community like no other is born out of supporters and runners alike cheering each and every single runner on. No matter if you know the person you’re cheering for or not you scream and shout with all your might to make sure they cross that finish line. Each year I come away feeling complete and utter awe and aspiration for these runners. Not just for achieving the mileage on the day but for the huge amount of time and energy they would have put into the race. It shows the sheer power and determination of the human race, to conquer the unthinkable, to continue when all you want to do is stop. To think that so many runners are also running for charities great and small just adds to the wonder. A wonderful camaraderie echoes around the entire city. People grinning from ear to ear, the runners high is infectious.

Deciding to Enter the Marathon

For the past 5 years or so I have said I will run a marathon. Each and every year I apply for the ballot and charity places to no avail. This year I was fortunate enough to secure a place through none other than Adidas UK – an absolute dream scenario! So how could I possibly give that up? Find out my reasoning behind why I didn’t run this year here. Just because I wasn’t able to run the marathon this year I sure as hell wasn’t going to miss out on supporting my awesome running fitfam gang! My friends and I spent the afternoon racing around finding all of the various superstar friends who were running it. Pure elation ran through me to see some of my nearest and dearest fit fam; the likes of Adrienne Herbert, Bradley Simmonds, Stephen Adjaidoo, Alice Tate and Aj Odudu absolutely smashing their marathon journeys. I felt genuine feelings of pride and empathy for my friends who I know train so hard and earned their time in the spotlight. Despite the feelings I felt for them I couldn’t shake my own feelings of disappointment. It was supposed to be my year. I wanted more than anything to be running by their side.

Adidas CMMTTD MARBLE CHILL BRA, ULTIMATE THREE-QUARTER TIGHTS

Being the Wrong Side of the Barriers

No matter how hard I tried, even with the incredible atmosphere and the wonderful human togetherness around me, I couldn’t shake one feeling. Sadness. I turned to Dave (my husband) along the route to our next viewing point and said “I feel sad and disappointed. I feel like a failure that I’m not there running with them”. This feeling had been haunting me ever since I got my knee injury and thereafter forfeited my marathon place.. Anyone who knows me knows how hard it was for me to make that decision. I knew deep down how badly I wanted to be the one pounding the pavement; smashing that life time goal. I knew that I didn’t feel good enough as an “athlete” because I failed to even make it to the start line. Thank goodness I have the love and support of those around me to try and convince me otherwise. Dave wonderfully pep talked me and told me everything I needed to hear at that point….”Kim you weren’t ready this year. You wouldn’t have been able to run at your very best which is what you would have wanted. You would have damaged your body even further (perhaps irrecoverably). You love your body. It is you life and your job to move and you could have risked that and put that on the line. You would have been in horrendous pain. It would have put you so much further behind in your fitness journey than anything achieved doing it in the first place”. All I can say is…Thank God for my boy! My goodness what would I do without this wonderful human? This was everything I needed to hear.

Adidas CMMTTD MARBLE CHILL BRA, ULTIMATE THREE-QUARTER TIGHTS

Not Running When All You Want is to Run

Discussing the decision further with my run coaches (Liv Ross-Hurst, Max Wilcocks, Stephen Adjaidoo, Rory Knight and Rob Allan – all absolute running hero’s!) there was a constant message…It wasn’t the right time. It became something that truly upset my happiness. The pressure I felt to run. The pressure I was putting on my poor little body…and why? Because I ‘had to run this year”? Millions of marathons take place every year throughout the globe. I may not have done London this year but I’m sure as heck going to take on another at some point in my life. Will it be next year? or in 10 years time? Who knows! What I know is that I would love to do it with Dave right by my side doing it with me. That I want to raise an inordinate amount of money for charity doing it and be in my best physical shape to do. I have the absolute utmost respect for any one that takes on the challenge of something like the marathon. For anyone who maybe deferred and went on to smash it the following year. Anyone whose dealt with injuries, rehabbed them and came out the stronger side of them. Maybe it wasn’t my fairytale marathon story but do you know what? That marathon finish line is sure going to taste even sweeter having had to work through my injury to get there. I have learnt more about my body by having to experience my injury, experiencing how to make it right. These learnings I can go on to pass on to my clients and friends alike. London 2017 you weren’t for me. You were however completely and utterly amazing.

Adidas CMMTTD MARBLE CHILL BRA, ULTIMATE THREE-QUARTER TIGHTS

Gratitude

Thank you for those who were strong enough to help me decide on what was without a shadow of a doubt the right decision for me to make. Congratulations to all the runners and a heart felt thank you to everyone who showed up to cheer them along. Together we run this world.

Sending health & happiness,

Kim x

Outfit:

Adidas 3/4 Tights 

Adidas Marble Chill Bra

Adidas Ultra Boost X Running shoes

 

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2 Comments

  1. 3rd May 2017 / 2:02 pm

    Ahh gutted I didn’t see you out on the course, could have done with the cheer! 😂 Also, you already know my thoughts but I’m so glad you feel ok with your decision at last, it was definitely the right one and you’re still a badass!

    • tonewhatyouown
      3rd May 2017 / 2:07 pm

      Aww you dream!! Thank you, so much love for you. Such a hero for running it, in such short notice too!! Must see you soon xxx

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